Dear Diary

Dear Diary,

About a four months ago a new girl started attending our church. Her name is Anna Jean Crawford. She is two years older than I am and I am not trying to be mean in the least,but I do not understand her. The second Sunday she attended my church with her family was potluck Sunday and I decided to try to get to know her better. I asked her about her interest and what the Lord was teaching her? To the first question she said outright that her only interests were Facebooking with her friends, and attracting cute guys. Then she giggled this silly little giggle. When I asked the second question hoping that her first comment was in jest, she looked at me like I must be a nut.

Since then we have been thrown together many times and every time she seems to take joy in shocking me with her empty habits. Last Wednesday I just couldn't keep pretending I didn't care. I expressed my concern for her, and explain about how God had such great plans for all His children, and I knew that He had more for her in life than Facebook or boys. I said it as gently as I could, but she really didn't take it that well. I didn't really expect she would, but I just felt that I had to say my piece.

Here was her reply. "What is it to you? This is my life? Why should you care what I do with it? If I want to sit around and do nothing, so long as I am not a burden to you, why should you care?" I knew my words had stung her pride, so I preceed with caution and prayed for all I was worth, "Lord, please open Anna Jean up to Your truth."

I didn't do to well. My voice trembled and I stumbled over my words a lot. I tried to remember Bible verses, I tried to express my thoughts, but I am afraid I really made a mess of it. I haven't seen her since. I pray every day but I am worried, what if I turned her away from Christ? My heart is troubled and I am not sure what I should do. I wouldn't blame her if she never talked to me again, but if she never give her heart to God because of something I said...

Lord,

Please use my bumbling words to reach Anna Jean's heart. I did not mean to say anything hurtful, I was so concerned for her, and maybe I didn't pray through it as I should. I'm sorry Lord if I really messed this up. Father, if I should have another chance to speak with Anna Jean, help me to say the right words. Lord, she needs you so much...soften her heart Jesus, let her know that You care, and that you have so much for her in life besides playing and wasting her days on foolish things like Facebook and handsome faces. Teach me to be more like You Lord, that I might be better able to lead others to You, that I might not make another mistake like I did with Anna Jean.

In Jesus Name,

Amen

I don't know what I will do. I don't know what I can do but pray...

With a tear and a sigh,

Kassandra Lee

Dear Diary

Dear Diary,

One of the ladies I work with asked me to pray for her husband the other day. He is struggling to be the man he knows he should be. I promised I would. That was a few days ago. Today she asked me if I had been praying. I said yes. "He's a changed man, " she said. "He cried all day Saturday without really knowing why. He was different in the way he acted all day." She was so happy and I could tell she was more hopeful about their struggling marriage.

God has amazed me again. I think He knew I needed a reminder of how powerful He is. Also, I feel He is reminding me to not despair when my prayers are not answered right away. I need to be faithful in praying always. He has the power to do the rest, in His time.

It is easy to pray when prayers are answered in a matter of days, but easy to despair when nothing happens after several years.

I must keep the faith and never give up. My God is powerful and He always answers.

Thoughtfully and thankfully,

Kassandra Lee

Dear Diary

Dear Diary,

"Then Jesus said to his disciples, 'If anyone would

come after Me, he must deny himself and take up

his cross and follow Me.'"

Matthew 16:24

Today I feel the Lord calling me to die to my selfish desires, more then ever. He is asking me to lay aside those things in my life which are distracting me from spending time with Him (fictional stories). I feel as if He is calling me to fill my heart with His words, and to turn a deaf ear to the world and all its noises. There are so many words, written and spoken, that are vying for my attention, but ultimately, only God's words are of lasting importance. God is calling me. Will I heed His call?

I pray with all my heart that I will be faithful to what He is calling me to do, and who He has called me to be. May He be my Light and Vision. Through Him, may I see all of life in a bigger and better way.

I must not fear, but take a leap in faith, denying myself and taking up my cross. The load is lighter with two, but when the person by your side is Jesus, it is easier still.

With a prayerful heart,

Kassandra Lee

Write That Down

I was in the first or second grade when I first began to journal. My mom wanted me to practice my newly learned writing skills, so she gave me a notebook and I would write in it everyday. I never wrote more then three or four very short sentences, but it was a start.

For several years, I did not journal, I am not quite sure why. I suppose my mom had quit requiring it and I had yet to discover the joy of writing.

For Christmas in 2002, one of my cousins gave me a pretty journal and that was when I began to discover the true joys of journaling. I started out with short paragraphs and slowly moved on to filling pages and pages almost everyday. In some of years since I have not written as much, but I have continued to journal, recording the important happenings in my life. I have discovered that, not only is journaling a joy just for the sake of writing, but it is also a great way to sort through my thoughts.

This love for journaling has given me an idea for a new series here on Musings From the Feet. I call it "Dear Diary," and it is the fictitious journal of 16-year-old Kassandra Lee. We will follow Kassandra as she learns important lessons in life and is reminded of how mighty her God is. I hope you enjoy reading about Kassandra's journey, just as much as I will enjoy writing it for you. Come back tomorrow to read the first "Dear Diary" post.

I have some questions for you. Do you journal? Do you do it on the computer, or the old fashioned way? What do you enjoy most about keeping a journal? I would love to hear your thoughts and stories.

Kathryn