Blessings of Being a Big Sister

I have never really written much about myself on this blog, because this blog was started to encourage others in their walks with God, not to be filled with the every day happenings in my life. That would be boring indeed. But, I have been so encouraged by reading stories about the lives of other big sisters, that I thought to write a few posts now and then about my family life might be a good thing.

I am the second oldest child in a family of twelve. I have five brothers and four sisters, and being a big sisters is one of my biggest joys. My siblings could tell you that sometimes I am not nice. If you are a big sister you know what they mean. Sometimes I snap at them, sometimes I put them down would I should be building them up. I am not perfect, but I try to do my best, and I have learned a thing or two along the way.

Number one, large families are a blessing. I have had a lot of people comment on how hard it must be on my mother taking care of all of us and homeschooling us on top of that. I smile every time. Many hands make light work, and we have many hands. Just about every child from a big family would tell you that they learned to help around the house at a young age, and that at some point they have helped tutor their younger siblings. Some would say that that is to much to put on a young person's shoulders, and that your growing years should not be filled with so much responsibility, but I know that for myself the added responsibilities, while not aways a joy, have made me a better person. I am more prepared for the responsibilities that come with being an adult, I am less selfish (I hope!), and I am more thankful when others go out of their way to serve me because I understand the effort that went into it. So, even though I started washing dishes at the age of four or five, and washing clothes a few years later, and changed dirty diapers more times then I can count, I still say, I am very blessed to be a part of a large family.

Secondly, when you are an older sister, your siblings look up to you, even when you mess up, so you really have to watch your step. Even though your siblings notice your mistakes, they usually are very forgiving and willing to help you do better. All you have to do is ask. The other good thing is, when you snap at them and hurt their feelings, they will forget it pretty quickly if you tell them you are sorry and then spend some time doing something they enjoy with them. Do not stand in fear of walking lest you make a mistake and lead your siblings astray. Step out on faith, asking God to guide you, and do not stop at walking forward, run. If you make a mistake, seek forgiveness, admit your wrong and continue onward striving to do better having learned from your mistakes. Your siblings will learn from you example and will admire the fact that you humbly ask forgiveness when you mess up, and that you do not give up, but strive daily to do your best.

One of the most encouraging things I have learned by being a big sister is, even if I never get the chance to do something big to change the world for Christ, if I am faithful in the little things God will bless me. One of those little things is teaching your younger siblings and helping to bring them up to fear the Lord and to encourage them to go about His business. It is a great privilege, and the responsibility of it is nothing if God is on your side. The rewards of watching your younger siblings grow into godly adults, who love the Lord with all their hearts, is worth every ounce of effort you put into helping them grow and so much more.

As an fellow older sister my advise to you is this: Give it all you have got. Be the best encourager, the best helper, the best playmate, the best teacher, the best friend, the best big sister you can be. You may feel discouraged because there is not an opportunity for you to be involved with groups who are making a difference in the lives of others. Your church and other ministry involvement may be limited, and that may leave you longing for something, anything, you can do for Christ. Be discouraged no longer. God has given you a special work. He has charged you to help your parents to bring up your brothers and sisters in the way they should go. He has given you the opportunity to learn how to serve and love unconditionally. Being a good big sister takes a lot of effort, let me tell you, and this work is preparing you for bigger things in your future. Noticed I did not say better things, because I think next to raising your own children, helping to raise your siblings is the most rewarding opportunity we are given.

Think of it this way. I have nine siblings. If they all grow up to be godly parents and each of them has nine children and their children have nine children and so on, and they were all raised to love the Lord as you helped teach your siblings too, you would have impacted twenty-seven lives, and that does not include the lives of those outside of their families that your siblings and their children and grandchildren may impact. Just think about it. God has given you a responsibility to touch the lives of those around you with His love, fortunately, He does not as us to carry it alone. He is ready to help us. Focus on living your life for Him, and the rest will not be so hard.

A warning, do not, I mean, do not, try to make your siblings be what you think they should be. Encourage them to be who God wants them to be. Pray with them and for them, and be there when they need you. Be a good example. Live your life for the Lord, they will be watching. That is all you can do. You cannot make them be who you want them to be, that is not what I have been trying to tell you. What I have been trying to say, is that you can have a lot of impact on you siblings lives by setting a good example. Chances are they will learn from you.

I would love to hear from all of you about what you have learned, whether or not you were home schooled, or from a large family, or not.

To God be the Glory,
Kaomi

The Name of the Game

One of the hot topics when people start discussing courtship vs. dating is which is better. Some people say, "We dated and we've been married fifty years." Others say, " We courted and divorced after five years." So which is better? There have been dating relationships that have worked out wonderfully and courtships that have ended in disaster.

The thing that we need to get a grasp on before we go any further is, the name of the game doesn't matter, so much as whether the directions to the game are biblically sound or not. As Christians this should be our number one concern.

Say your family loves to play Nuts (a card game). One day you are gathered with some friends and you challenge them to play Nuts. You explain the game and they say, "Hey, that sounds like Peanuts. We love that game!" Come to find out it is the same game, just they call it Peanuts and you call it Nuts.

It can be that way with dating and courtship too. Not all dating relationships are bad and not all courting relationships are good. It is not so much what we call our relationships, it is more the focus of our relationships. Whether you choose to call your relationships dating or courtship is totally up to you.

The reason that a lot of Christians like to use the term courtship is because dating evokes images of frivolous, fun filled, undirected, undisciplined relationships, where as courtship speaks of cautious, fun filled, disciplined, purposeful relationships. We will get more into that later.

To sum things up, the name of the game is just that, a name. If your name is Susan and your sister's name is Christa, that does not make one of you better or worse then the other. Your behavior is what defines who you are. The same with dating and courtship. The name does not mean a whole lot, it is the behaviors of those involved that define the terms, and that is the bottom line of the issue.

A Look At Hebrews 10

I know that this post is much like my last, but I have been reading through Hebrews, and it just popped out at me as something I should write on. Perhaps it hit me harder because of my last post. In Him,
Kaomi

~*~*~*~

"Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful. And let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works, not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the manner of some, but exhorting one another, and so much the more as you see the Day approaching. For if we sin willfully after we have received the knowledge of the truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins, but a certain fearful expectation of judgment, and fiery indignation which will devour the adversaries. Anyone who has rejected Moses' law dies without mercy on the testimony of two or three witnesses. Of how much worse punishment, do you suppose, will he be thought worthy who has trampled the Son of God underfoot, counted the blood of the covenant by which he was sanctified a common thing, and insulted the Spirit of grace? For we know Him who said, 'Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,' says the Lord. And again, 'The LORD will judge His people.' It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God. But recall the former days in which, after you were illuminated, you endured a great struggle with sufferings: partly while you were made a spectacle both by reproaches and tribulations, and partly while you became companions of those who were so treated; for you had compassion on me in my chains, and joyfully accepted the plundering of your goods, knowing that you have a better and an enduring possession for yourselves in heaven. Therefore do not cast away your confidence, which has great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that after you have done the will of God, you may receive the promise: 'For yet a little while, And He who is coming will come and will not tarry. Now the just shall live by faith; But is anyone draws back, My soul has no pleasure in him.' But we are not of those who draw back to perdition, but of those who believe to the saving of the soul."
Hebrews 10:23-39

~*~*~*~

How many times in our lives have we heard the phrase: "No matter what you do, God will still love you." While that is true, I think many of us fall into the trap of doing wrong and then just brushing it off because God loves us anyway.

Even though God does love us unconditionally, He hates sin. When we knowingly sin as Christians we are "trampling the Son of God underfoot," as it says in Hebrews 10:29. We are saying that Jesus' life, given on the cross for us, is not of great worth to us. We are insulting the Son of the Most High God!

God does not take our insulting His only Son lightly. God will not idly stand by and watch us trample His Son under foot. "Vengeance is Mine, I will repay," it says in Hebrews 10:30. I typed that last part in bold print because I think each of us needs to remember that we serve a just God. One day we will have to stand before the judgement seat and account for all we have done.

We need to remember what our little sins cost God. Yes, God is a forgiving God, but if we repeatedly do wrong and know all the while that we are doing what we have been commanded not to do, we will be accountable. Those who do not know God's Word cannot willfully disobey it, but for those of us that do know His Word, what excused do we have?

Remember Hebrews 10:26-27? "For if we sin willfully after we have received the knowledge of the truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins, but a certain fearful expectation of judgment." I personally have willingly sinned against God more then once in my life, so when I read this passage it jumped out at me. I stand in fear of the Lord, and His judgment, but I sorrow with the knowledge that I have taken the death of my Savior so lightly in the past. I say I love Jesus, but if I do, then why do I trample His sacrifice underfoot like it was nothing but trash?

One day I will have to stand before that very same Jesus and have to answer for what I have done. The shame would be so great that I could never lift my head again if I did not know of His grace. The fear of His judgement would make me shake at the mention of His name if I did not know of His love. I cannot take back what I have done, but I can go forward loving Christ as never before because, that He would even look at me after what I have done to Him is amazing.

Next time you are tempted to do what you know is wrong, remember that Jesus loved you so much that He was willing to die for you even thought He knew that there would be times in your life when you would willfully sin. He paid the highest price when He knew we could never be worthy enough. Just think about it.

Sin Is Sin

I am sorry that I have not posted anything in so long. It is not because I did not want too, nothing could be farther from the truth. It is just that I have been so busy with those last minute summer things. You may wonder at the title to this post, "Sin Is Sin? Who would have ever thought? Who are you kidding?"

It all started a week ago when I was sitting with some other girls in church. We were fixing to go out and witness to folks and invite them to church. We were sharing our testimonies, praying, and just sharing our past mistakes. I did not really know any of the other girls I was sitting with, only having met them a few days before. Their stories made me so sad. They got to talking about this bad thing and that bad thing that they had done, seemingly trying to out do each other. Finally they turned to me and said, " You probably never did bad things like we have. You don't look like the type who would."

I had to assure them, that yes I had done bad things. I did not share what my "bad things" were because I knew they would laugh. They would think what I have done is nothing compaired to what they had done. I wanted to remind them that we all have sinned, everyone of us. We all need to be saved. We all need Jesus.

You see, it does not matter what you have done that you consider to have been bad. Maybe you just told a little lie, maybe you murdered someone. The fact is, you are a sinner. You have done wrong and are destined to hell unless you have asked Jesus to be your Savior and Lord. In God's eyes sin is sin. The lie little Susie told her mama is equal to Jimmy James killing his next door neighbor. There is no such thing as a little sin, a "good" sin. As Charles Spurgeon said, "If you sin, sin boldly. Every time you sin, you are saying that sin is worth more to you than the cross of Jesus Christ."

God has no 1 to 10 scale to measure how bad you have been. We are all equally sinful. We are all equally in need of a Savior. If you do not know Jesus today then I urge you to change that. God is waiting with open arms. Tell Him you are sorry for the mistakes you have made and ask Him to come into your heart and to save you from your sins. Nothing you have ever done makes you so bad that you are beyond the reach of the Master. Do not wait. Ask Him in today.

Egg-less Chocolate Cake

Egg-less Chocolate Cake

3 c. flour

2 c. sugar

1/2 c. cocoa

2 tsp. baking soda

2/3 c. oil

2 tsp. vinegar (we use lemon juice instead)

1 tsp. vanilla

2 c. cold water

Heat oven to 350 degrees. Grease two 9 x 1 1/2 inch cake pans and dust with flour.

Mix flour, sugar, cocoa, baking soda, and salt in a large bowl. Then add the remaining ingredients and mix until well blended, about 1 minute. Pour batter into pans and bake until tooth pick comes out clean, about 35 minutes. Let cool 10 minutes before removing from pans. Frost and serve, or do not frost and serve. Either way is good!

We have had to fall back on this cake many times. Having an egg-less chocolate cake recipe is handy. It is a really easy cake to make, good for beginner cooks, and it tastes just as good as a chocolate cake with eggs. It rises well and is always moist. Enjoy!

The Triumph of Evil

I have always loved a good quote, and the other day as I was going through my quote collection I came across one I have often pondered. It is an old quote from Edmond Burke:

"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing."

I can't help to think of the truth in it. Just think if we Christians stood up for what we believe in. I don't necessary mean the "big" things that seem too big for our seemingly minuscule influence, but the issues we see every day. Things we come across at work and school that we know aren't right. I know I am often guilty of "doing nothing" just walking away or trying to ignore it. What would happen if we stood up? What would our world be like? What would the people around us do? Would they be surprised?

Right Way, Wrong Way, Which Way to Go?

As a young girl I dreamed of the day I would wear a long white gown and carry a bouquet of flowers walking down a long aisle to my beloved and pledging my life to his. I often wondered how I would meet him and how long we would date before we got married.

When I was just reaching my teen years I had a bomb dropped into my lap. My mother and I were talking one day. She was telling me about how she and my dad met and about some of the dates they had gone on. Then came the shocker, the "I hope you don't date," line. Not date? If I did not date, how would I ever meet my prince charming? If I never dated, I would never meet any men, I would never marry. My dreams were shattered before my childish eyes. I did not understand, but instead of asking my mom how she expected me to meet a man worthy of my heart and hand and not date, I kept silent in my confusion.

Inside I was fuming. "Well, you can say what you want, but I will too date!" I was angry because I did not understand. I was confused. If I did not date, I would not marry. That was how it worked right? For somewhere around a year I continued in a state of confusion about the "not dating" thing. Then my mom gave me a book, Waiting For Her Isaac. It is a story about a Christian home schooled girl and how she matures into a marriageable young women. She meets a lot of struggles on the way, like moving, not having any like-minded friends nearby, an accident, and more. But the thing that struck me most about the story was the family's approach to marriage and how to get to know a guy before you marry him.

They used this term that I had heard before, but thought was so out-of-date that no one really used it anymore. Courtship. That was when I begin to wonder if perhaps there was another way. If perhaps dating was not the one and only way to meet and get to know a man before marriage.

Since then, the topic of courtship vs. dating has fascinated me. I read everything about it that I can lay my hands on. It has become a topic I am passionate about. Why? Because I feel sure that there are girls out there who are looking for the same answers I was not so long ago. If you do not date, then what, and is dating really so bad in the first place?

In the next few months I would like to write a series of articles and share with you what I have learned about dating vs. courtship.

Chocolate Chip Cookies

Chocolate Chip Cookies

3/4 cup sugar

3/4 cup packed brown sugar

1 cup butter

1 egg

1/2 tsp baking soda

1/4 tsp salt

2 1/4 cups flour

1/2 package chocolate chips

Mix together butter, eggs, and sugars.

Mix in dry ingredients, and chocolate chips. Stir well.

Bake at 375 for 8-10 minuets.

This is our secret family recipe. ; ) We usually do a double recipe because cookies seem to disappear quickly in our house. =) Enjoy!

No Limits

Some days are up and some are down. Some days I wake up praising God for another day, and all I see is sunshine. Other days I wake up wishing I could go back to sleep and everything is dark and full of doom. I guess it will be an on going battle. Depression no longer consumes large portions of my days, in fact I do not remember the last day I was really depressed for more then a few minutes. Things are looking brighter, and better somehow.

This summer I have plans for visiting friends, study for and taking the THEA, and plans to put God first and to blindly trust that He knows what my next step will be even though I do not. I know that plans are not everything. I know that carrying them out will be hard, but the first step towards anything is said to be the hardest. I have made some first steps, now whether or not they turn out to be good first steps, I have yet to find out.

I am not sure that I am up to whatever God sees fit to be my next challenge, but I have told Him that what I want more then all else, is to follow Him, to know Him better. I have whispered for Him to do what it takes, to break me. When I am broken, only then, do I feel my great need for Him. I could cry when I think that breaking me might mean losing something dear to me. I do not want God to break me at the cost of others. I think, I would rather die, but I am struggling to let go of my fears, and to trust that He knows best, and that He will not allow the suffering of others to be the only means of reaching me.

I do not believe that God makes bad things happen. I like to think that He only allows bad things to happen because He knows that that might be His best means of reaching us. Then when bad things happen, He reaches down and touches our lives in such ways that we know He is everything He says He is and so much, much more. I cannot make myself believe that He would reach down and give me cancer, even if it was the only means of bringing someone else to Him. Surely He loves me too much to purposely wish that on me, but I do believe He would allow me to get cancer so that another might be reached, or so that I might be pulled closer to His side through the trial.

It is to hard for me to even begin to understand, but God, He sees things differently then I do. He sees not only the past and the present, but also the future. His ways are so much more far reaching then mine could ever be. His plans are so much greater. I do not believe I have begun to learn what He is teaching me about being contented, and about rejoicing in every circumstance. I know in my heart, that should He allow me to get cancer, or to become blind, or any number of things, that I should rejoice in it because He allowed it for a reason, and because He has great plans in store. But, I do not believe I could rejoice. I would probably be to bound up in being sorry for myself, to busy crying over what I could not have, over what I would never have. But the Bible says that life is only but a moment, a moment in which we are commanded to give God glory, not just sometimes, but always.

We get to caught up in the daily cares of life. All we see is today. God sees the big picture and I think that we need to stop daily and take a look at our lives through His eyes. Our life may not be all that we want it to be, it may not be all that we have planned it to be, but whatever we are going through, we need to remember that God is in control and He can use everything for His glory. Everything. Whether that be your bad health, your broken dreams, your stained past, or something as small as a tooth ache. God has amazing power and an amazing vision. Let's not limit Him, or limit His plans for our lives.

So while I am yet a weak sinner and have only the strength to whisper for God to do what it takes to get me running to Him, I hope that one day I will be shouting for Him to do whatever it takes to get me living for Him. Whatever it takes. I pray for the faith and trust of those who are willing to serve Christ even though they know it will mean death.

I have been brought up in a country where Christians have freedom to worship. Some would say I am blessed, and I guess I am, but I often wonder if it would be better to face death and know without any doubts that my trust is in God alone, or if it is better to be free to worship and never know for sure if I would love or trust God enough to face death for Him. Is it really better to love God only when He is good to you (in your eyes) and be able to worship in public, or is it better to love God so much that you are willing to face death for Him and to worship Him hidden from the sight of those who would kill you?

In America our faith is thought so little of, Christians are scorned for their so called faith. Faith many would turn their back on if it meant life over death. Faith that is supposed to be based on the Bible, the same book that many Christians have never read all the way through, and the book that they know relatively little about, the book that non-Christians have been known to be able to quote from memory better then noted Bible scholars. I am so ashamed of what the church has become. A group of people with limited knowledge, with limiting visions, with limited, watered-down, and re-written Bibles, with limited faith, and with a limited God. When I look at what the church has become, I am not surprised at what our country has become, or what our world has become.

We have a God with limitless knowledge, with limitless visions, with limitless power, and with a limitless love. Let's not limit Him. In our everyday life, let's not look at the world through the worlds standards, through human eyes, but let's look at it through God's eyes instead. Changing our outlook can change our world. Take the challenge and live a life for God that is not limited by what people think, but only limited by God Himself. The possibilities are endless.


When we are weak
Then is He strong,
When we can't walk
A shoulder to lean on.
In times when we're afraid
The Hand to guide us along;
Yes, when we are at our weakest,
Then our God is strong.

Happy Independence Day!

As we celebrate the birthday of our great nation, I thought it would be good for us to rememberthe words of Francis Scott Key as written in the Star Spangled Banner.

Usually you only hear the first two or three verses sung, but I have posted all four verses here. All of us know the words by heart, but please take the time to really read what he was saying. I think it is very important that we remember the history of our nation, because it is through the reminder of why our forefathers were willing to give all they had, even their very blood, for freedom that we remember why we must not throw their gift of love away. Why we must continue to fight to keep our freedom intact.

God bless all those who are fighting to keep us free, whether it is in the government, the military, or in the home.

Remember, freedom is never comes without a price. What are you willing to give for your freedom?

The Star Spangled Banner

O! say can you see by the dawn's early light

What so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming?
Whose broad stripes and bright stars through the perilous fight,

O'er the ramparts we watched were so gallantly streaming?

And the rockets' red glare, the bombs bursting in air,

Gave proof through the night that our flag was still there.

O! say does that star-spangled banner yet wave

O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave?

On the shore, dimly seen through the mists of the deep,

Where the foe's haughty host in dread silence reposes,

What is that which the breeze, o'er the towering steep,

As it fitfully blows, half conceals, half discloses?

Now it catches the gleam of the morning's first beam,

In full glory reflected now shines in the stream:

'Tis the star-spangled banner! Oh long may it wave

O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave.

And where is that band who so vauntingly swore

That the havoc of war and the battle's confusion,

A home and a country should leave us no more!

Their blood has washed out their foul footsteps' pollution.

No refuge could save the hireling and slave

From the terror of flight, or the gloom of the grave:

And the star-spangled banner in triumph doth wave

O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave.

O! thus be it ever, when freemen shall stand

Between their loved home and the war's desolation!

Blest with victory and peace, may the heav'n rescued land

Praise the Power that hath made and preserved us a nation.

Then conquer we must, when our cause it is just,

And this be our motto: 'In God is our trust.

And the star-spangled banner in triumph shall wave

O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave!

--Francis Scott Key

Father's Day

I know I am late with this Father's Day post, but it really could not be helped. I decided to post it anyway, because loving our fathers should not be something we do only one day a year.

---------------

For me, Father's Day is a day to tell my dad I love him, but even more then that it is a reminder for me to respect and love him every day. Father's Day is like sticking a sticky note on your bathroom mirror to remind you to do that thing you know you will forget. Except I never forget my dad. I never forget to love him, that is like breathing to me. What I do forget is to always respect his wishes (because God asks me to do so [Exodus 20:12]), even if I do not agree with him. I also forget to take those little opportunities every day to show him how much I care. In short, I take my dad for granted much of the time.

So, this Father's Day I remembered all these things, and promised myself to try harder in the coming year to love my dad more and to not take him for granted.

I thank God for giving me a godly father who has taught me so much about what is really important in life.

I love you Daddy! And happy Father's Day to all the fathers in the whole world. May God bless each of you.

Kaomi

Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy;
Love does not parade itself, is not puffed up;
Does not behave rudely, does not seek its own,
Is not provoked, thinks no evil:
Does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth;
Bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things,
Endures all things. Love never fails.
1 Corinthians 13:4-8